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Wednesday, October 01, 2008

This one's for you, Grandma

I said goodbye to my grandmother yesterday.

She passed away unexpectedly, but peacefully, on Friday, Sept. 26.

She was an angel on earth, who has finally found her way home. A woman who would give and give, and never accepted anything in return.

For me, it has been difficult.

Most memories of my grandmother are from when I was young. She took my family into her home through the most difficult of times. She would take care of me and my younger sisters when we came home from school, while my mother would work to make life better for us.

It was her home that I spent most of my childhood growing up in. In this home, I was always surrounded by family that taught me the values I now carry with me as a man. I remember the loving hugs and kisses that only a grandma can give to her beloved grandchildren.

So as I ran my 5 miles yesterday, the memories of her were still fresh in my mind. After only 2 miles, I could go no further. I broke down. And as I stood there and looked up into the heavens, I remembered the words the pastor said at her memorial service earlier in the day: That no matter what we do now, she will be looking down on us, making sure we are doing good. And scold us when we are not, just as she did in life.

So I bowed my head, put one foot in front of the other, and continued forward.

As I turned west along my running route, I saw the most beautiful sunset. I closed my eyes, lifted my arms, and felt as though my spirit was being lifted. My run felt effortless, and my conscious was clear.

It was the most difficult run of all. But in this very moment, I felt her presence beside God. It made me happy, and gave me the will and the strength to carry on.

For this, I am grateful.

Thank you, grandmother, for blessing us with your time here on earth.

You will always be in my heart.

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7 Comments:

Blogger Lisa said...

I'm so sorry Jesse. Your post is incredible.

Lisa (L33sa on Twitter)

8:00 PM

 
Blogger Jen S. said...

I'm so sorry to hear about your grandma. I lost my grandfather in July, and I think I've finally gotten over being sad about it all the time. (I think he'd be happy about that.) This reminds me, I must visit grandma. Hugs!!!! You sound like you were a great grandson. :)

8:10 PM

 
Blogger Lindsay said...

That was the day before our 13 mile run. I am amazed that you were able to run that the next day. I'm so sorry to hear about this though Jesse. I'm glad that you were able to see the sunset yesterday.

9:16 PM

 
Blogger Jesse said...

Thank you all for your very kind words.

10:33 PM

 
Blogger runner-grrl said...

I'm so sorry for your loss, and you have my condolences. Death of loved ones is just never easy.

Yesterday was one year from when my mother passed away unexpectedly. This post: http://run350.blogspot.com/2007/10/goodbye-mother.html and the next several were around her loss. --Alex

7:22 AM

 
Blogger Jesse said...

Alex- As I mentioned in my comment, I simply cannot fathom the pain one must feel in losing a mother. I hope you have found peace in your loss. Thank you for sharing that with me.

8:03 AM

 
Blogger Jessica said...

I'm sorry for your loss, hun. I'll be praying for you *hugs*

2:25 PM

 

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